words . unclasp. emotions

I sat hugging my knees, my face facing the sky; I prodded my head a little forward as if I was kissing the sun back. I felt the golden rays writing sentences on my brown skin as my antique raindrop earring almost, almost wanted to take a free fall, but unlike the other raindrops. It stayed, it floated. Unlike. That has been my favourite way of being. In a city dripping with red, you'll find me in grey. My words will leave you with thoughts like the silence in a history museum. Silent, yet a hushed background of voices, of people, movement and restored moments. It's as if I wake up every morning and spin the wheel, to see which extreme emotion the day holds. Mapping every emotion with colours, colours with words, words with people, and people with smiles. A story of smiles. I laugh, I live, I unrest. Being anxious, paranoid. Like an oversized black t-shirt made of what-ifs, I wear it almost every day. And I can't not. I make mistakes. I mess with ti...

I am a small human dipped in a tub full of blue paint. Feeling a different blue every single day. Jolting up and below like a crazy ball on a trampoline Exhaustively out of control. To one end corner, to the other diagonal Shooting up high and collapsing smiles. Somedays It's a bright blue. I sleep with a wide smile, for I have people that make me feel loved and find me beautiful. Best Friends who forgive me even though we haven't talked talked lately. There are days when im just sitting on my best friends penthouse terrace, with her dog tied away because im afraid. A group of seven friends with one missing, forming an asymmetrical tangram. Humans that seem to be made of laughter, Pain hidden like that annoying meme page. Spilling out the truths, and the darkest side of them Believing that it will camouflage with the darker night. Then there's a pale light blue that makes me feel light. When they tell me I have a whole different vibe. When they tell me...

I'm a girl made of those small things you forget. I remember the details. I remember how I was taught to brush, my aunt is a dentist and she would say it every day, "not more than a pea-sized toothpaste else you will get a stomach ache." Yet I would use thrice the pea-sized toothpaste. When I look back now, I realize I liked knowing what would happen when I did something I was not expected to. I remember the details. Some day, a bad day when my grandfather was admitted to the hospital, And we were on our way to visit him, my mother almost got hit by a blue Volvo bus. Thank the almighty she didn't. And that scene is still so vivid in my head. Looking back I understand that life can be granted or taken away in a split second. I remember the details. I remember the first time my sister gifted me an ornated loop earring, black metal only because it's my favourite. She bought that with her little savings, the money she had saved every day over three mo...

                                   I write on naked streets and in crowded closets. I write of how the world will eventually forget. How things will eventually fade. And how what you had yesterday is not what you have today. The world is a crazy place. And let this cute psycho tell you fools a secret. ~ One day Your breath too will forget you. so don't you worry when people do. Your face will be forgotten for the city doesn't reflect you. Your voice will be forgotten for the world is a cacophony of voices. Your emotions will be forgotten for the world is a harsh huge heart. But. Your words. They will roar like a breaking mountain. They will trample the sinful like dancing tribal feet. They will conquer and Bloody complete. And so that people eat my words for breakfast, I write. I will write on naked streets and in crowded closets. Vajj©

Laugh like it's the funniest joke, ever. That's how I live at the moment. I laugh to forget the pain. I laugh to invite hope. That's how I strive to make a day better. My head might be a mess. Mental mess. I might be screaming on the inside but it's so easy to crack me up. Not like somebody is trying to make me laugh (fortunately or unfortunately, I haven't found that someone yet, long way to go) it's just that people are themselves and I just laugh, I find things funny. I guess someday, I would've lost everything in life and still be laughing; at my plight. However, it is a nice feeling to laugh; Laugh like its the funniest joke, ever. 1 hour to go for my birthday. I turn 17 in an hour. And my head is playing a reel of short films of all the moments I've laughed at, been laughed at, felt terrible yet laughed it off and many more. And I just realized so many people have made me laugh, every damn day. But one name is dancing in my head. You are a...

I’m sure we have all faced this day.  There are days when my head’s a complete mess. I’m cladded in some confused envelope. People talk to me, I just hear and what I usually do is LISTEN. An emotional outburst is a next consequence, might be anger or a tear. Basically “messed up’’ is the phrase and this phrase is super claustrophobic. It’s not that there is no single reason for this phase, its just that it’s a footprint of so many reasons, so it's unimaginable and preposterous to point out at ONE. But…… There’s always an answer to hammer life’s pressure. Clouds. My most favourite; a beautiful element of this world. They just calm my mind. All kinds of skies. Blue ones remind me to clutch calmness and tranquility crackles. Orange ones give me strength and seem to scream “you are worth what you dream” Black ones. The most beautiful; thick black clouds which looks like it has been smeared with ash. These black clouds give me this unending satisfaction cause I ...

It was not even late. Sun bright enough for your eyes to glare. I saw a path ahead and three men with obnoxious stares. If that stare was an ocean, filth was every drop . Emotions of disgust churned in me . Any person from the outside would not sense one bit of fear; cause that’s how I was raised ~ to be loud, brown and fearless , but the truth was I was frightened, panicked and anxious every second. Every step felt clumsily brisk and I guess only good souls in this world could sense my fear. Suddenly I heard a boy scream : “Hey, simran!! WAIT” Dude that’s not even my name. But still I turn back and this boy is running towards me, he seems to be of my age. I pause and look at him, wondering if it’s a familiar face ,after moments of thoughts , it was still a clear no. I didn’t know him. By now he’s beside me and says, “come lets walk” and he initiated a lovely conversation . Oh wait, I doubt if I can even call it a conversation, he was the one talking and I was the lis...